The Crazy Rants of Samantha BurnsMaui Wowie
It seems our supreme ruler, Oprah, has set her sights on purchasing more land on Maui.
You know, I'd hide myself in a bomb shelter for 4 years if it ever came down to her becoming president of the US.
It seems the big O bought 25 hectares to add to her already 41 hectares of island ownership. I suppose it's good that she is maintaining it as conservational land, but I wonder if she'll sneak her way around that contract some day in the future. You know, greed begets greed.
So, I wonder if this deal is the reason why she bailed on Ebony and Jet magazine's founder John H. Johnson's funeral. That's a pathetic excuse for missing such a significant moment in black history (yes, I said "black" for any Canucks or others who think it's racist; bite me hard). If you take offense to that, you may be interested to read this by MR.BIG.
Perhaps, though, Oprah felt the need to buy the land after being shot down by the Hermes store. Lol, she felt so bad about being viewed as a regular shopper that she had to overindulge with 25 hectares.
Or, perhaps Oprah has all her big bucks due to some drug related corruption. I mean, they don't call it Maui Wowie for nothing. Hmmm... it just so happens that she bought land on that island, eh, hmmmm.... Maybe she won't become supreme ruler of the US, but overlord of the drug market, lol.
Hey Oprah, if you do get into the drug scene, can you name your stuff Oprah Poop (I happen to like that title).
Comments
Big O? Why are we letting giant anime robots buy land? Doesn't seem safe to me. http://www.ehobbyland.com/VCD/DVD-TheBig-O.jpg
Fun fact about Hawaiian land: in many cases, you own the structure but the lease the land from large estate-holding companies (you would take out a mortgage on the house and lease the land from somebody else). In fact, until a 1967 law (that wasn't really effective until 1984 due to litigation), that was your only option. Now through some kind of governmental maneuvering, you can also own the land.
And 25 hectares... let's see.. that'd be 61.775 acres for us non-metric folks and 41 hectares would be 104.311 acres for a total of about 163 acres. Ah, now I understand how much land she has.
Posted by: Dangerous Dan | September 29, 2005 12:37 AM
Thank you for using the phrase "bite me hard". It catches the spirit of the moment for me.
Posted by: Mondocognito | September 29, 2005 06:16 AM
Oh man... She's scary! I have a t-shirt that has her picture on it and says "more powerful than God" ready to go in my shop... Ironically i'm afraid to put it in there!!! It's such a cool shirt too!!
Hmmm kinda makes you wonder where Katie girl is gettin' her Cocaine from doesn't it!
Posted by: Lingo Slinger | September 29, 2005 08:05 AM
Is this where she is going to store the Mecha Mega Oprah? Will we see her giant robot flying accross the land to stop french boutiques in times of peril?
Posted by: Rich | September 29, 2005 04:43 PM