The Crazy Rants of Samantha BurnsTop Ten Reasons Men Are Happier Than Women
Contributed by Tony from Sand in the Gears.
1. We don't have to sleep in the wet spot.
2. We have the affection of the far more lovely and talented sex.
3. Very little is expected of us, so when we do something right, it's usually a welcome surprise.
4. Vasectomies are far more expensive than the pill.
5. Childbirth.
6. Peeing in the snow. Don't judge if you've never done it; it's really quite exhilirating.
7. Having an orgasm is not a complex ritual requiring the right mood and a precise alignment of moon and stars.
8. Sagging is not as much of a threat to our emotional well-being.
9. High heels, panty hose, make-up, bras.
10. With the creative use of commas we can limit a 10-item list to ten items.
Contributed by Tony from Sand in the Gears. GO. VISIT. NOW.
Note from Mr. Big: HA - In your face Samantha! First, intelligently fisked and now outdone, as us men have our own superior top 10 reasons!
Comments
For what it's worth, my vasectomy cost $20.
$10 co-pay for the initial consultation with the doctor, $10 for the in-office operation being done a month later.
For what it's worth.
Posted by: Jaybird | October 29, 2005 01:15 PM
Bah. There are three and ONLY three reasons men are happier than women:
1. Televised sports.
2. Remote controls.
3. Women.
Posted by: Francis W. Porretto![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.samanthaburns.com/nav-commenters.gif)
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October 29, 2005 01:58 PM
I had my vasectomy done on the National Health so the only cost was balls as big as watermellons for a week after.
Posted by: stevo in Taichung | October 29, 2005 06:21 PM
Hey Samantha- Loved your post about Madonna. I just saw her whole dramatic MTV bio reality filmed dealie (bio-hazard more like, total waste of 3 hours of my time) and she has gotten to be a total frootloop nowadays. I feel sorry for her pathetic helpless children. Thanks for the link in your random blogroll box. I love reading your blog! Keep up the good work :D
Posted by: day lee | October 29, 2005 09:10 PM
3. Very little is expected of us, so when we do something right, it's usually a welcome surprise.
Ain't it the truth! ;)
Posted by: Diane | October 29, 2005 10:46 PM
I'm with Mr Big on this one.
Posted by: Vincent | October 30, 2005 11:30 AM
Just to get back at the guys for being so smart assed- I've added to the top ten for women.
11. Women get to decide if the man is going to have sex or not tonight.
12. It's the last 10 seconds of the Superbowl- you're team has the ball, running running running down the sideline. Two defense guys catching up to him. And the whole thing can be ruined by your "woman" who's been waiting all afternoon to ask you something. The fate of whether you miss seeing that last play- lies in her hands.
13. We get to decide whether your white undies stay white or end up pink- due to that horrible incident during laundry washing which included us washing our red shirt with your white undies.
14. Did I mention that WE get to decide if YOU get to have sex?
15. PMS- we're not as miserable as we are going to make you.
16. We have more shoes.
17. Crying will most likely get out us of a speeding ticket.
18. We're not as gallable as you, see #17 for evidence.
19. Sweetest Day, Valentines, Anniversaries of every half way signifcent day we've decided to use to make you buy us stuff.
20. See #14 again.
Posted by: L. | October 31, 2005 06:09 AM
11. Don't forget, men don't get old, only more dignified.
Of course, that is women's fault, really. If they were as shallow as we are, then men would get old too. They are the ones who decided to look deep into our souls and appreciate it more than looks. We never asked them to, but it's nice.
Though that might be changing. With all the queer eye shows, we might soon find ourselves in a world where men do indeed also get old.
Francis,
if only we had remote controls for the women!
Maybe that's what heaven is like.
Posted by: PlutosDad![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.samanthaburns.com/nav-commenters.gif)
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October 31, 2005 10:59 AM