The Crazy Rants of Samantha BurnsTop 10 Weird Digital Music Creations To Come
With all the concoctions they're coming out with for listening to music, I thought I'd make a top ten list of possible new and weird iPod/MP3 ideas.
1. iPod undies: romance your mate with a tune. Play a little Barry White, oh baby!
2. iPod toilet seat: every time you sit down to take a dump, you won't have listen to your own plop, plop.
3. iPod docking station elevators: now you can take the lame cr*ppy elevator music with you when you leave.
4. Karioke mp3: oh gosh, I hope they don't already have that.
5. Vibrator/pocket rocket mp3: get funky with some default, cheesy porn flick music.
6. For the boys, mp3 Teddy Ruxpin and for the girls, iPod Cricket.
7. iPod casket: in case you get buried alive accidentally, you'll have something to listen to.
8. mp3 womb installation package: they say to nurture unborn children with music, so why not install the music directly.
9. mp3 doggy chew toys. So that you don't have to listen to that frickin' squeaking all the time.
10. Celebrity iPods: programmed to play one of your favourite celebrity's tunes. For example, you can get the Celine Dion, which will only play her cr*p, or you can enjoy the David Hasselhoff and listen to Ooga-Chaka all day.
Got any ideas of your own?
Comments
I don't have any but that womb implantation one is great!! I'd get a patent on that yesterday ;)
Posted by: Diane | January 17, 2006 06:49 AM
How about an iPod butt implant. When you fart it plays your favorite tune.
Posted by: CC Rider | January 17, 2006 08:03 AM
MP3 pint glass, when it is empty it plays 'One burbon, one scotch, one beer' till the tender refills it. AAA approved.
Posted by: mdmhvonpa | January 17, 2006 08:15 AM
I'm holding out for the Colt 1911 iPod in .45.
Posted by: jimmyb | January 17, 2006 11:55 AM
How about an iPod Puck that plays non-stop hockey anthems. The music doesn't stop until the puck is left alone for a duration longer than 5 minutes. The speakers are crazy-ass powerful little built in suckers.
Either that or an iWash!! No longer do you need to be bored to tears waiting for your laundry. You can be washin' to the oldies!!! Yeah! Get your freak on in the laundry room!
Posted by: SeLiNa | January 17, 2006 12:46 PM
Posted by: Mark B. | January 17, 2006 02:33 PM
SeLiNa - leave it to a Canuck to come up with the puck idea, lol.
Posted by: Sam | January 17, 2006 03:54 PM
A few years ago there was a ski jacket that was iPod friendly. You would plug in said iPod in a special sleeve pocket and use controls on your arm to control the damn thing. Keeping that in mind, your ideas are not too far fetched.
Posted by: Maidink | January 17, 2006 03:58 PM
Good Lord, Sam. Don't you read Boing Boing? Number 5 already exists.
Link
By the way, I only just noticed that I actually won a "Moron Of The Week," a while back. Do I get a prize or something? How about a commemorative Michael Jackson snow globe or something?
Posted by: SpoonFighter | January 17, 2006 10:04 PM
Sam,
That iPod underwear?
Invented.
Posted by: Alex Nunez![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.samanthaburns.com/nav-commenters.gif)
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January 17, 2006 10:05 PM
Wow, what WON'T they make?
Posted by: Sam | January 17, 2006 11:49 PM
38 cents a gallon gasoline
Posted by: Diane | January 18, 2006 05:21 AM
Here is a link to that jacket. It was by Burton.
Burton and Apple Deliver the Burton Amp Jacket
iPod undies? Where will the insanity end?
Posted by: Maidink | January 18, 2006 06:31 AM