The Crazy Rants of Samantha Burns

Welcome to another meeting, you PERVs.

Let's get right down to business, shall we?

Fellow PERV, Dangerous Dan, reports that our PERV members have been taking some positive protest steps in Washington lately.

Our co-conspirators, I mean nutjobs, I mean botanical emancipators from PlantAmnesty have been protesting the mutilation of some city trees in Lynnwood.

Friends of some trees standing in a business area of Highway 99 were "protesting what they say is improper pruning of trees in public places".

Skwer and 13 members of PlantAmnesty, a Seattle-based group whose mission is to "end the senseless torture and mutilation of trees and shrubs," held signs and waved to drivers from a parking strip on the southwest corner of 180th Street SW and Highway 99.

It was also reported,

A PlantAmnesty member who identified himself only as "Ox" had several stalks of bamboo strapped around his waist and rising far above his head.

"This is a crime against nature," he said, looking at the pruned trees, believed to be maples. "Whoever did it ought to be strung up. Why do we need to have tree circumcision in this town? It's not therapeutically indicated."

Now, although we here at PERV don't support wrapping up in bamboo - because that is torture for the poor, innocent bamboo sticks, we do agree with Ox.

Quit circumcising the trees already!

Even if it does make them look bigger.

So, we have support in that arena. Now, we just need to focus on how to conquer the senseless abuse and murder taking place in greenhouses and tree farms around the world.

Oh, the humanity!

In further news, we have word from third world county that people are using vegetables to masticate. Cruel world, when will you ever learn?

Join PERV And Stop Veggie Mastication Now!

VIVA LA PERV!

Meeting Adjourned.

Appreciation goes to VP PERV Diane's Stuff for the logo.

Some open trackbacks today Freedom Watch, Blue Star Chronicles, Conservative Cat, imaginekitty, TMH's Bacon Bits