The Crazy Rants of Samantha Burns

Got this idea from Right Wing News, who has a great set of people (mostly political, or politically related) he wouldn't want to be stuck beside, and I thought I'd add my own list. Two of mine are similar to those rated in the poll taken on this topic.

1. Tom Cruise - I really wouldn't want to be stuck hearing him babble on about it wacko alien beliefs.

2. Courtney Love - I'd be too afraid that the heroin needle in her purse would jab me during take off.

3. Pamela Anderson - I fear the breasts would take up too much seating space, and I'd be stuck in a tight corner with my face plastered up against the window.

4. Paris Hilton - I'd be too concerned that my IQ would slip well below average just sitting beside her.

5. Ben Stiller - I'd be afraid his ape fur would get into my airline meal (ditto to Robin Williams, but at least he'd be funnier).

6. Sean "Puffy" Combs - or P. Diddy, or Poo Daddy, or whatever the h*ll he's calling himself today. I wouldn't want to sit beside him on a plane because I don't feel like getting shot.

7. David Hasselhoff - See # 3.

8. Julia Roberts - I'd be afraid she'd bite me by mistake with her horse teeth as she tries to chew on her salisbury steak.

9. Oprah Winfrey - I don't feel like being "healed" today.

10. Anna Nicole Smith - Ugh. Aw geesh. Ick. All around, just ew. I can imagine the plane ride smelling terribly (for some reason, I've just got this feeling that she's a smelly person), while I'm cramped up in the corner and my IQ lowers several points as her stupidity rubs off on me.

Bonus: Barbra Streisand - same as the breast idea only with her nose. I mean, this chick tries to get her nose into everything, despite how moronic she comes across.