The Crazy Rants of Samantha BurnsHow Would You Like A 10 Year Erection?
I wouldn't think any man would complain about a 10 year erection, but someone has:
A former Rhode Island handyman won more than $400,000 in a lawsuit over a penile implant that gave him a 10-year erection.The jury had actually awarded him $750,000, but the judge reduced it because he thought it was excessive (the monetary award, not the penis).
Charles Lennon's attorney added,
"He's not a whole person."Ya, but in my opinion it was his own d*mn fault since he made himself that way by not allowing nature to take its course. Just because options are available to us, doesn't mean it's right or smart to do it. And, why didn't Lennon get the problem fixed as soon as he realised there was a problem?
In his defense, he argues that he
cannot have the implant removed because of health problems, including open-heart surgery, his lawyer said. Impotence drugs could not help Lennon even if he were able to have the device taken out, because tissue had be to removed for it to be implanted.Ya right. 10 years ago, he got the implant put in, and 10 years ago when the problem first "arose", he could have had it removed.
Quit your b*tchin' mellonhead.
At least you're permanently "ready" for anything.
Lol.
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Comments
This gives new meaning to the phrase "The Man of Steel." Or something like that.
With his "problem" he could earn the nickname of "Ol' Ever-ready."
The comic possibilities are endless.
Posted by: Mark Shipley | July 6, 2006 11:16 AM
Or how about "Woody" for a nickname?
This guy needs to be in the record books.
When I was a teen many years ago I heard the phrase "It's not how big the plow, but how long you stay in the field." Now I know what it means.
I've noticed on some erectile dysfunction they say if you have an erection that last more than 4 hours seek medical help.
Heck if it was me I'm getting documentation and making some phone calls.
This guy has it made and doesn't even know it.
Posted by: Mark Shipley | July 6, 2006 11:25 AM
Hell, at least he had some place to hang his keys. I always seem to be losing mine.
Posted by: Richard | July 6, 2006 12:52 PM
Richard - He could hang his keys, hat, and cane on that thing.
Mark - good stuff on all of what you said, lol
Posted by: Sam | July 6, 2006 01:04 PM
Thanks, Sam!
Posted by: Mark Shipley | July 6, 2006 01:34 PM
Um, gosh, I guess it's not really appropriate then to ask him on which side he dresses... more of a 3D thing actually.
[was squirming in my seat reading this post, lol)
Posted by: The MaryHuntert | July 6, 2006 02:00 PM
Yeah, some handyman he turned out to be!!!
I bet his motto now is "An erection is a terrible thing to waste." That would make a great bumper sticker!
I can just see this guy in a singles chat room…he'll go by the alias of "Long-fellow."
This guy has it made, he's got money, "long lasting" sex appeal—a real babe magnet.
Suppose that the "I've got a headache" excuse doesn't apply in his case though.
Posted by: Mark Shipley | July 6, 2006 02:56 PM
It reminds me of the following joke:
A man went into a local pharmacy and asked to talk to a male pharmacist.
The woman behind the counter informed him that she was the pharmacist. She
told the man that she and her sister owned the store, so there were no male
pharmacists employed there.
She then asked if there was something she could help the gentleman with, as
she had been a licensed pharmacist for many years. The man shrugged his
shoulders and agreed to share his problem.
"Okay," said the man, "but this is a bit embarrassing for me. I have a
permanent erection, which causes me lots of problems and severe
embarrassment. I was wondering what you could give me for it?"
The pharmacist said "Just a minute, I'll go talk to my sister."
When she returned, she said, "the best we can do is 1/3 ownership in the
store and $3,000 a month in living expenses."
Posted by: BobG | July 6, 2006 04:34 PM
Me: Erect from the ages of 13 to 19.
First Date: 23
Posted by: Dave Munger | July 6, 2006 10:41 PM