The Crazy Rants of Samantha Burns

This post submitted by Lostinlimaohio, and not approved by Sam.... at all, in any way.

I've been hearing a lot of complaining about the price of gas lately. I really can't say that I understand any of it, because personally I've noticed that despite the so called "rise in gas prices" it still costs me the same to fill up my tank as it did five years ago. In fact, by sending my husband to do it, I not only haven't had to experience the raise in costs, but I also haven't had to deal with that "just put gas in the car" smell on my hands.

So, because I have had the luckiness of marrying someone who is willing to pump gas for me, I really had no idea what the rest of you have been going through.... at least not until today. In fact, today my eyes were completely opened up to the problem that so many of you are facing, and I feel for you all.

It seems that gas prices have gotten so bad, people are having to make the most difficult choice in the world, which is probably also the most important choice they will ever have to make:

Put gas in the car, or have sex with a hooker.

That's right people. The cost of gas has gotten so incredibly high that some of us are having to give up sex with hookers just to be able to fill up our tanks.

Now, before you start scrambling to count the money in your wallets, and checking the gas gauge on your car against other gauges- you should know that there is help out there. Yes, there is a way for you to manage to have both gas in your car, and a hooker in your bed- all thanks to a brothel in Sydney.

Australian brothels are offering clients discounts based on their gas bills. [...] "If you come in and spend time with one of our lovely ladies, we'll give you a discount of 20 cents a liter," Kerry, manager of Sydney brothel The Site, told Reuters Wednesday. [...] Once you've filled up your car, bring your receipt to the brothel and they'll discount the price of your visit.

That's right folks, you can still afford to fill one tank and empty another. Never again will you have to face the tough decision of whether you should get laid or get gas.

This post submitted by Lostinlimaohio, with many apologies to Sam.