The Crazy Rants of Samantha BurnsWatch Out Aliens, They're Coming For You Next
If you didn't think lawyers could sink any lower, you were wrong.
Abducted by aliens? Call now for compensation:
A German lawyer hopes to drum up more business by pursuing state compensation claims for people who believe they were abducted by aliens.I should hope so; you've got to be pretty pathetic to sue over an insane claim like that."There's quite obviously demand for legal advice here," Jens Lorek told Reuters by telephone on Thursday. "The trouble is, people are afraid of making fools of themselves in court."
Side note: I didn't know they had fellas named Billy-Bob or Cletus in Germany.
Lorek, 41, is pinning his hopes for success on a German law which grants kidnap victims the right to state compensation.You've got that right. No one's laughed until now, but boy are we laughing hard at your stupid idea now that we've heard about it.Asked if he was worried he might look ridiculous by seeking justice for clients haunted by aliens, Lorek was unfazed.
"Nobody has laughed about it up until now."
What's next?
Suing the government for allowing Santa and the Easter Bunny to enter homes in the middle of the night, aka Bunny B&Es or Kriss Kringle Capers.
