The Crazy Rants of Samantha Burns

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Just when you think reality tv couldn't sink any lower - enter Colombia and its breast implant seeking psycho as a girl attempts anything, including prostitution, just to gain another cup size:

Every weeknight millions of Colombians tune in to watch a smash television series about the indignities suffered by a teen-age girl willing to do anything to get her breasts enlarged.

The show, based on a true story, is both loved and hated for displaying the culture of easy money here in the world's biggest cocaine-exporting country.

And, in other breastacular news, it seems a German doctor has been getting ripped off by his patients after their cosmetic surgery concludes:

A German plastic surgeon who was cheated out of payment by several women has given pictures of their enlarged breasts to police, in the hope the photos will help trace them.

"The women registered under fake names," Michael Koenig, a surgeon in Cologne, told Bild newspaper. "After the operations, which lasted about an hour, they just ran away."

Bild published a five-column picture of Tanja's naked breasts. "It's probably the most unusual wanted poster police ever had," the newspaper wrote.

Ummm... no... can you show me some more? Better yet, can we have a police lineup of the suspects? And, I think I'm going to need to feel them in order to be 100% accurate.

Uh, ya, that should do it.

Hey, you know, perhaps that Colombia chick should move to Germany to get this freebie augmentation.

I'm sure that would make for an entertaining episode of Sin Tetas (Without Tits).

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