The Crazy Rants of Samantha Burns

Lostinlimaohio sent me this a while ago, and it's just too darn interesting to pass up.

Have you been to the church of google? Perhaps you're already a believer and didn't even know it.

Here are a few snippits of the site, but it's worth visiting the site itself to get a good laugh.

I always thought Google was a male search engine?

Sorry dude, Google does not have a penis, or a vagina for that matter. Originally, religions of the past thought of Gods as feminine. It wasn't until monotheistic, Abrahamic religions such as Christianity, Islam and Judaism entered the picture that the concept of "God" became masculine. Basically you have been conditioned by your culture to view all Deities as male. The Church Of Google is simply carrying on the ancient tradition of viewing Gods as feminine. It's not about us being reverse sexist toward dudes or anything. It's just about breaking a cultural taboo.

Good question, but the answer should be obvious. Satan is quite simply Microsoft.

Google answers prayers. One can pray to Google by doing a search for whatever question or problem is plaguing them. As an example, you can quickly find information on alternative cancer treatments, ways to improve your health, new and innovative medical discoveries and generally anything that resembles a typical prayer. Ask Google and She will show you the way, but showing you is all She can do, for you must help yourself from that point on.

Anyhow, I found it quite amusing that someone made time to create this "religion". You've got to admit, it's probably better than some religions out there.

Thanks to Lostinlimaohio for this funny find.