The Crazy Rants of Samantha Burns

Here are some great finds from Jim.

Earlier this year, Britain's Ann Summers sex-product company announced it would stop selling its remote-controlled Love Bug 2 personal vibrator in Cyprus after Cypriot military officials complained that the device's signals were interfering with army radio transmissions. [The Guardian (London), 5-6-07]

What? No more remote controlled lovin' in Cyprus? Well, I'm not visiting there now.

But, at least we've now learned another weapon against the enemy. Next time we packed them off to a war, we're going to have to arm them all with Love Bugs to intercept radio signals.

Ready, set, attack. Buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz....

A woman in Columbia University's hospital had her gallbladder removed in March not by traditional abdominal surgery but by running instruments through her vagina, according to an April New York Times report. Doctors said that abdominal-muscle cuts are painful and slow to heal, and that surgeons are considering using the body's other natural openings, also, for some procedures. (In a landmark 2004 operation, doctors in India removed a patient's appendix through the mouth.) Still, a female New York University surgeon said the idea of gallbladder surgery through the vagina is "repulsive." [New York Times, 4-20-07]

Now, what will they call it if they start taking out the appendix through the vagina, a vagin-dectomy? I don't know about you, but slow healing or not, I think I'd like to save my certain openings for certain things and leave the surgeries to the abdominal area.

John Brandrick told London's Daily Telegraph in May that he will seek compensation from Royal Cornwall Hospital in Treliske, England, because he's still alive. He was diagnosed in 2006 with pancreatic cancer, with about a year to live, and he quit his job, stopped paying his bills, and used his life's savings to enjoy his last days. However, he was recently told he merely had (non-fatal) pancreatitis, and now he's broke. [Daily Telegraph (London), 5-7-07]

Well, Mr. John Brandrick, perhaps the hospital can fix all that for you. I'm sure they'd like to turn that non-fatality back into a fatality after you sue them for something that's your own d*mn fault. Dying or not, we've all heard of miracles and hospital mistakes. Get over it and get a frickin' job!

Thanks again, Jim!